I get it, my feet smell.

For 8 months out of the year I have smelly feet, I wear flip flops for the other 4. Let me preface this by saying my feet aren’t inherently smelly, they just get put in a lot of situations which result in a less than favourable odour. I’ll give you a for instance – on Saturday I went for a nature hike in the still snowy hills of the Kootenays. As you would expect, I wore a pair of sneakers which make for practical footwear for hikes in the summer, but in a foot of snow they act as foot stink breweries.

Now here’s where it gets complicated.

One might think to take off one's socks after the nature hike and go barefoot (in the event dry socks are not available) if not in the comfort of one’s home. I, on the other hand, would rather the shame of smelly feet than the chance of someone catching a glimpse of my unsightly dogs. You see, one summer I had a freak accident while swimming and booted off my big toenail. Almost a year later -- to the day -- I kicked it off again making for some awful looking tootsies. I don't like to draw attention to this as it grosses me out and I loathe the idea of anyone looking at my feet when they aren't at their finest. It's been quite some time since I've sat in the ol' massage chair and dunked these hoves of mine in a tub at the nail shoppe.

What I'm getting at is... where do I get a pedicure in these parts?